I heard the gasps of surprise before my video connected on my end. I knew that the people in the meeting could see me. The green light of my laptop camera shined. In those few seconds delay as I entered the Zoom room, I set my face and held my head still. My hair proceeded me into the digital space.
I’ve temporarily dyed my hair purple, and I knew it was going to be a thing.
I did it on purpose.
I wanted to change my hair.
And I KNEW
Who are apologies for? I ask this question in ethics classes. My students and I have discussions about things like why people apologize, how, and when — especially the when, timing matters in apologies.
In the recent months, three groups I have some history with or current stakes in have issued what amount to apologies for past racism. Each time these statements were issued with grand fan fair, even in pandemic times — there were press releases, news stories, prepared speeches, videos. …
I am an insomniac because of my father’s drug addiction.
I can remember what I was doing on each and every one of my birthdays since I was 3. A Mickey Mouse themed 3rd birthday with neighborhood friends, a house party when I was 4, a trip to the movies when I was 5, an amusement park when I was 6, Chuck E Cheese when I was 7. By the time I was 8 my home life had come undone. Love couldn’t win over crack. …
Recently someone asked, “What will you tell your daughter about sex?” Whoa, who knows? Parenting is improv. I sometimes try to do it like I teach my courses — with clear objectives and planned out experiences, but mostly I just wing it and try to be fully present for her and hope that’s enough. Really, that was all I was missing as a kid, fully present, listening adults. Like I say all the time, I was loved but I also had to learn really early how to fend for myself when it came to just about everything. Sex was no…
The recent Lifetime documentary, Surviving R. Kelly, has sparked conversations about the normalization of sexual predation and the grooming of children by adults in our culture on social media that I have been teaching about in college courses for the last decade. Years ago, before I started teaching about these issues, I started writing about my own experiences in an attempt to make sense of what I thought about love, desire, and power as a young Black feminist. As a young teen an older guy in my neighborhood took an interest in me...
When I was 13, I lived in…
a creative and an academic with diverse interests in writing, art, personal style, and activism.